@fesshole completely fair to me. Also, counselling is treatment, and time off / flexible work schedule *is* a reasonable adjustment for many health conditions, including long-term grief, so you should have a basis for it anyway.

(I am not a lawyer, doctor, or occupational therapist. Please seek advice etc)

@fesshole good for you!

@fesshole

The best fucking therapy.

@fesshole Fucking brilliant. Malicious compliance.

@fesshole that's excellent!! I wish I'd thought of that!! When my mom died I'd never experienced grief and I had a hard time too. After a few weeks people at work asked why i wasn't over it yet...

@fesshole
Excellent idea and so much more affordable than psychotherapy!
@hannu_ikonen

@fesshole that manager wasn't a good pèrson,i think

@fesshole@mastodon.social if I was your boss I'd be totally fine with that and be confused as to why you didn't just say that

@fesshole Good for you! I lost my mom 18 years ago today. It was absolutely the worst day of my life and I will never stop missing her.

@fesshole I kinda think that works too

@fesshole That is horrible of your manager to tell you that. I lost my mom 25 years ago and I still struggle at times. I hope you can find peace and solitude. And I'm very sorry for your loss.

@fesshole Well done, well deserved

@fesshole
Is there a time limit to mourn? Or did your manager think it was enough because he/she has never suffered a loss him/herself

@fesshole I lost two of my grandfathers within a year. My work suffered after the first death, because we did not see each other for over 20 years. Then a year into that, the second death happened. This time it was closer and I tried to work over it, planned a vacation and then I saw that the limit was reached. I juggled tasks like crazy around and broke unspoken rules. The client was not amused and rolled me off after 3 years. When you open up, you seem weak. When you don’t, you work in grief.

@fesshole Excellent! I hope you took that time, enjoyed it but also grieved in a way which properly suited you. Never easy, but you coped admirably. 🖖

@fesshole Work wife from my old job lost her twin sister recently (Xmas Eve, ffs), and had a few people give her the "time get over it" line within a few weeks. Union rules only got her 3 weeks of bereavement leave. She did find a grief counselor, but health insurance only covered a few visits. She found an affordable one and has been having weekly sessions that seem to help her cope. She's in a steadier state now but still gets triggered sometimes. Grief takes time, you have to live through it.